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So I understand how it's easy to believe nonsense when you're brainwashed from birth, and how it can be comforting to believe your life is somehow very important in the grand scale of the universe, and how you don't have to be afraid of death because you'll go on to a better place where you'll live happily ever after for eternity. That doesn't get better unless you humble yourself, either -- admit you might be wrong. If you can genuinely deconvert her then cool. I am married to an ER doc and agree that having your own life, being independent, and not going into the relationship with any preconceived notions is what makes it work for us. Marriage is hard, period. His fellow resident is married and seems like a good guy, I want to believe my bf will change. Now those are not the problems in my head anymore, whats in my head is how arewe goin to deal with this, ive told her sometimes u wont have anytime for me nor for your kids if we decide to have kids you wont be at the holidays nothing like that and she is always tryin to see everything positive and tells me dont worry ill schedule myself, and im like baby you will not be able to schedule urself your life would be in a hospital.