When I was 11 years old, my mother silently snuck into my bedroom. Under the cover of midnight, she sat cross-legged at the end of my bed and proceeded to give me The Talk, although it was more of a whisper. Instead of focusing on the anatomy of sex — the biological prophecies by which, some say, our bodies were made to meld into one — my mother chose to emphasize pleasure. She spoke about the importance of passion: pursuing it, asking for it and finding it within yourself. Society has a tendency to perpetuate this idea that the older a woman grows, the more she yearns for the beauty of her youth. It was once bewildering to me that my mother could be so candid about sex.
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Do women want steamy sex or just a companionable cuddle? Bettina Arndt reveals what really gets women going. What do most women of a certain age want? Melbourne-based psychiatry professor Lorraine Dennerstein conducted path-breaking research on menopause which found many women reported a drop in libido at this stage of life. But not all women. Those who found themselves with a new man reported their sex drives were flourishing! Of course there are older women who simply never lose their sex drives, or who miraculously regain interest once young sprogs are off their hands.
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